This past year has been a pretty crazy time for me. Some of the things I’ve gone through I have shared here on Facebook and others I’ve shared in person with those closest to me. It’s been one of those seasons where I’ve really felt the love and kindness of others to get me through the most difficult times. I realized two things today though that made me want to stop and post again: 1) That I don’t always remember to stop and update about some of the positive things happening … and 2) We really don’t always know what someone else might be going through. It can be so easy to make a quick judgement about someone’s behavior when they might be going through a really crazy time we know nothing about.
During this recent time, with everything I posted and shared, I was also going through some issues in which the doctor thought I might have cancer. An initial, routine test I had done came back looking abnormal. She said, “don’t worry but we really need to do more testing.” Don’t worry is a really hard one for me. Don’t worry, but worst case it’s cancer is even harder. It took a lot of God’s Grace to do the day to day until the next appointment. The next step was a closer look at the problem, and if that looked off doing a biopsy. That next step happened the day before my dad’s funeral/memorial services. The doctor acknowledged that it must be hard for me to be there that day but she was “really glad” I kept the appointment. Again, the don’t worry thing was really hard to do. During this appointment, she determined that by the way things looked she did need to take a biopsy. She needed to take four in fact. I was told I’d have the results in about a week and she was praying for me. When she didn’t even tell me “don’t worry”….. well…. you get the idea. My dad’s service came and went. My heart hurt, my emotions were hurt, my brain hurt trying to process life and don’t worry, and in all honestly I was in some physical discomfort from the biopsies. But, that week passed and my phone rang and it was the doctor’s office. And it was the doctor on the phone. Not the nurse. Because the doctor wanted to tell me herself that everything was NORMAL. Everything was fine. Praise God. The amount of worry I really was holding on to that I didn’t even know I was holding was lifted and it felt amazing. I hung up and cried. A lot. For so many reasons. I share this, because it’s a GREAT thing. And, I want to share happy and praise as well as less than happy and requests for prayer. AND – as a reminder to myself – that EVERYONE out there has those “but don’t worry” things they are going through. So, let’s all remember to extend God’s grace and love through our actions and attitudes toward others.